The Big Ugly Blog is an honest and uncensored collection of anecdotes recounting the madcap shenanigans of a perpetually 39 year old divorcee, as she wades through the mire of the murky online dating pool - ravenously searching (evidently in vain) for the man of her dreams...Keep On Dreaming, Baby!


Sunday, May 23, 2010

P.S. Twitter, I Love You...

Like so many people in the great big wide world, nowadays - I too have become more than just a leetle preoccupied with foolin' around on Facebook. I was a comparatively late arrival to FB actually, and even after finally setting up my profile (only a couple of years ago) I remained somewhat retarded in my Facebook growth for a good while. By now though, I've definitely gotten the hang of it and some days (and nights) I spend ridiculous amounts of time, poking around on the site - shocking...I know...

My very most favorite thing about Facebook (and the reason that I rarely ever utter a single unkind word about it) is the fact that because of FB, I have been given the chance to become (sometimes even better) friends - again - with people from my distant past...acquaintances with whom I otherwise would've lost touch completely. It is entirely Facebook's fault that I've been able to reconnect with the now grown-up kids from my childhood and the artists and musicians from back in my crazy party days as a young adult living in my hometown of Richmond, Va.. And...although it may sound somewhat hackneyed, I'm not exaggerating a bit when I say in all seriousness - that my extended Facebook family, has consistently been there for me - to celebrate the good times, and lift me up during the bad - while my "real" family (save my four, dear, sweet children, of course) neglects to be supportive or even an entity at all in my life - and for this newfound familial bond, I feel enormously fortunate and grateful.

I wile away many happy hours, nosing around on my friends' profiles, staying abreast of what all they've been up to, but most especially - I dig how easy it is for me to keep them present in my life by simply thumbing through their photos or making quick comments on their status updates and posts. Historically, I've been horrible at corresponding, which would explain why so many of my old friendships faded into oblivion (pre-Facebook)...and so I'm stoked that FB facilitates keeping these friendships current, hopefully for a very long time.

Now, about the whole Twitter thing...

Ok so, I signed up on Twitter even more recently than when I followed the herd and finally got going on FB, and immediately after hesitantly boarding the Twitter train and tweeting maybe...mmmmm...a total of once(?) - it became clear that I had no clue how to properly and effectively tap into all that (I now realize) Twitter does have to offer (still learning, in fact). In my timidity and intimidation, instead of just futzing around with it a bit, I chose to let my account go dormant...until just very recently. I'm not even sure what gave me the kick in the pants to tinker with it this time, but once I got the gumption to examine Twitter a little more closely, I quickly began to appreciate the wealth of benefits that regular tweeting could potentially afford me...particularly as a blogger hoping to increase my visibility on the web.

I have been slow on both sites, to amass "friends" and "followers" and yet even having so few - I've noticed a distinct difference in the social dynamic between my friends on Facebook and my followers on Twitter. Again, the majority of my FB friends are people that I have known for a number of years, with only a smattering of online guys and friends of friends - rounding out the bunch. My Twitter peeps, on the other hand are - by and large - complete strangers, hailing from all across the globe, and brought into my world because of some common interest. Even cooler still, is the fact that I feel a growing bond - a genuine friendship forming between me and a handful of my Twitter followers. And these are folks, that were it not for Twitter, I never would even have met. To me, that shit is totally badass!

I talk with my Twitter friends frequently, despite the sometimes crazy differences in time zones. And I tend to talk to my FB buds, most commonly by commenting on their walls and through my tweets, which automatically appear on my FB as status updates. Twitter for me, is about actively conversing, where Facebook is more about speaking my mind to an oftentimes uncomfortably silent audience.

One of the things that I love about Twitter, is the camaraderie I feel with certain of my like-minded "followers". I feel a kinship to these people even though we've never met in person, and chances are better than good...that we never will. Their nurture and encouragement has not only brought me to feel that I am amongst true friends (though literally strangers), but has also helped me to embrace and define the person (or the alter-ego, as it were) best suited to represent my Big Ugly Blog, because lord knows that most everything I do anymore, is for the unapologetic promotion of my silly, trashy blog.

Before Twitter, I tentatively tried to mold and shape my Big Ugly identity. Since Twitter, I've been able to speed up that process, thanks in large part to the support base I've found in my new friends there. I would never have made the decision to post my weekly #H(alf) N(ekkid) T(hursday) pics., had it not been for the expert and tender guidance of one particular follower, who metaphorically held my hand all the way up to the point when I finally found the courage to post my first semi-nude pic...on the internet...for the whole world to potentially see...until the end of time. But where Twitter has helped me shed reservations about becoming the person that I now feel I was always meant to be, Facebook keeps me from going too far over the top, since every single thing that I do on Twitter, automatically winds up on my Facebook...and FB is slightly less tolerant of the overly-risque.

I've admitted in prior blog entries, that I am far from being what one might call, "book-smart". My formal education was abruptly arrested after I flunked out of the 10th grade, and because of that - you won't catch me claiming to know shit about much. But in daily life, if a specific subject captures my attention, I do try to learn as much as possible about it, so in that regard, I'm in this sort of perpetual state of learning - through living. I am constantly reminded though, that no matter how much I experience or think I might know, there's always some new and compelling topic to spellbind me...and during my brief tenure as a Tweeter, I have been turned on to some pretty bitchin' shit. It's almost embarrassing to admit to how truly sheltered I must be, having not known at all about some of the stuff to which I've just recently been introduced on Twitter. I am however, not too proud to fess up to my ignorance.

Luckily, a large percentage of my Twitter pals are folks of a very forward-thinking, open-minded sexual persuasion, perhaps entering my Twitterverse because of the adult(ish) content in my blog, or having found something in my tweets germane to their own points of view, or even more simply because they were curious about my ever-changing AV's. And I gotta tell ya', the more time I spend (sometimes voyeuristically) getting to know this diverse group of people, the more it becomes clear to me, that I've still got a helluva lot to learn.

Although age-wise, I am old as the hills, I sometimes feel like the awkward Twitter newbie, trying to hang tight with the cool kids. I am constantly blown away by exquisitely written accounts of eye-opening sexual encounters and musings. But being inherently visual, it's the posts and reposts of delectable images urging the viewer to contemplate whether the subject matter is art...or is porn...that keep me inextricably entranced.

I guess it wouldn't be too out of line to say that I've had my fair share of sex...straight-up, good ole-fashioned S.E.X., but my new friends on Twitter have brought to light - a whole new world of sexual practices and in doing so, it's become quite apparent to me what a lightweight I am, in comparison. Rather than hanging my head in shame for being so apparently delayed in my sexual growth though, I am excited to be creating a bucket list of sorts, of the many intriguing disciplines in which I hope to dabble with a lover, some day.

(Gawd, I talk a LOT!)

There is a specific category in this infinite catalog of yummy, erotic pics. that consistently has me creaming my pants. Picture this: a tight-angle, black and white image of a stunningly beautiful woman working some guy's cock the way she might slowly savor a popsicle on the hottest day of summer...spurs in my mind a lovely vignette of her...methodically carrying every sweet, sticky drip with her rapacious tongue, from the bottom along the entire length...repeatedly...making sure she's not missed a trace...and then gently she slips the pop deep inside of her mouth, her lips loosely surrounding the base. Now applying more pressure, she sucks her way to the eyes closing as she purses her lips gingerly against the swiftly softening treat, swirling every melted, tasty drop - in her mouth for a sec. before reluctantly releasing all that heavenly goodness, the rest of the way down her throat....mmmm...fucking good...And although this is one example of how these still photographs can make my imagination run wild and my hand reach for my toy, it is not the thing that really gets me going - nope, nada, huh uh...

There's a genre of imagery that stirs a desire in me, that I've only recently discovered exists (another approving *nod* to dear Twitter, Cheers!) And I'm here to tell ya', the instant my eyes locked on that very first image, of the intricate and elaborate rope-work evidently implemented in certain forms of bondage...I became irrefutably obsessed. Have you guys seen this stuff? I mean seriously...I never had. (check out: I respected the labor-intensive effort involved in what I found to be an amazing art form, but what really spoke to me was the implication of what would eventually go down between the woman who was bound, and her lover...and it occurred to me that my submissive nature would coalesce beautifully with a paramour skilled in the art of control...ropes or not.

I realize that the master craftsmen who weave such spectacularly gorgeous yet effective restraints, must no doubt be few and far between, and so I don't even kid myself by thinking that I might ever find out firsthand, how they go about working their magic. But what those photographs have done, is awakened in me, a previously unrecognized, deep-seated proclivity to want to be seriously dominated...


  1. I totally came.

  2. haha, what does that mean?

  3. I enjoy that you enjoy your readers getting ultimate enjoyment from reading your posts. Perhaps more erotica and/or photos? ;)